Today was a tough day. 

Hard lesson learned. 

So the last couple of years, I have come to a pretty big understanding of what level I was capable of going to to make other people happy.

What I was prepared to agree to to try and fit in or be included.

I’m 42. I’ve lived in pick me energy for most of my life in significant percentage of the possible areas where relating experiences occur.

Typing that out now just makes me want to cry. What a time to have an AHA.

I have liked who I am for a long time now. A really long time. Through my “oblivion” though, I truly had no idea how much of my truth I gave away in the hope of fitting in or having good outcomes if I let people see how compliant I was in ensuring they were happy before me.

Until today.

So, let me give you a bit of a heads up. When you hear or read ANYTHING that says put yourself first – no matter what – then do it. 

When you put yourself first, everything that comes about because of that is for EVERYONEs highest and greatest good. Even if that means someone’s highest and greatest good is not with you, it’s with someone else or in another situation. By you being in your truth, it gives THEM the right to make the choice if it suits them or not and they can leave or stay.

When you are in people pleasing mode or pick me mode, you cast a net that has really sticky bits, and while you are putting yourself last, and empowering others by giving away your power, that sticky stuff catches onto other people too.  

Not just you.

It’s like my favourite saying, “the truth will set you free” – you know how if you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember what you’ve said.

It’s the same with people pleasing. You are lying to yourself, which in turn means you are lying to other people too. 

Trying to fit in is the worst decision you could ever make. 

There are 7,000,000,000 people on this planet. If there’s any TRYING involved, then you are doing it wrong.

Step away from the sandpit and try again.

I’m telling you, from the bottom of my toes to the tip of my soul – and my soul is gargantuan: an arse is an arse is an arse no matter which way you turn them. 

If a person shows you who they are the first time, the second time and even the third time, then for heaven’s sake, believe them. 

Don’t buy into that bullshit of turn the other cheek and allow them their story. Just run screaming – flail your arms for greater effect if you need to.

Do stay in awareness with your arse-o-meter. 

You can be in dispassionate compassion while you run screaming the other way and acknowledge that their arse-ness must be there for some reason.

Don’t worry for them if you realise that you need to start running. The spot you leave vacant will have the right person take up that space in a jiffy and you never know, that new person might just be the right one to de-arse-ify or more possibly, help build a greater group of like-minded arses, you know like find their tribe.

Everyone deserves a tribe and to be around people that make them hum.

If there’s no humming, make tracks toute sweet.

I repeat today was a tough day, which was at the end of 4 tougher ones. If you are reading this, you are reading it for a reason, and I implore you to make sure you are putting yourself first. No. Matter. What. 

Make changes now so that 2014 is the dawning of the new you. 

Please leave a comment if you know how I could patent an arse-o-meter. I fancy being a millionaire by the end of 2014.