Today I completed a two day course in living consciously with Deb Webber.  There were 16 of us in the class, all with very different reasons for being there.  When it was my turn to say why I had booked into the course, I just said “to gain clarity”.  I wanted to end the sentence with…what’s my deal here…what’s my role in this bigger picture?

I have known for a really REALLY long time that I have had abilities with messages and intuition and having dead people around me and a couple of years ago it was all opened up, brought into alignment…or if I was honest, I just started listening and trusting what was there and became fully aware of it.  I think that’s probably really what happened.

So even though I have had loads of confirmation and not only within self, but with the people I have been attracting into my life, I still needed to go and seek clarity. 

I really need to SCREAM – FEAR IS SHIT.  FEAR IS DANGEROUS. FEAR IS NOT YOUR FRIEND…BUT MOST OF ALL….FEAR IS NORMAL…BUT DON’T LISTEN TO IT.  It will hold you back, it’s not here to protect you, it’s here to hold you back. 

Look and make a list of what you are frightened of in your life.

Are there lots of things there?  Are there lots of little arrows coming off the individual lines with the break down of the real fear or myriad of fears associated with that single line?

What did I need clarity of? 

Just how much fear I had surrounded myself with in my search for happiness.  Just how much fear I had surrounded myself with in living my truth.  Just how much fear I had for my friends who I knew had to be there as well this weekend and hoping they received their clarity too.  Just how much fear I was holding in my throat at communicating what the weekend was actually about to my husband.

So what happened then?  I got what I came for.  The fear is gone.

I also learned that my friend’s journey is their journey, it is not mine and it’s ok.  My job is to encourage, give cuddles when needed, be excited for them for their new experiences and to listen when they needed to get something off their chest.  I also learned how much fear consumed them as well….all of them…and if you are all reading this…you know what I mean.

I learned how much not dealing with something….. soon after it has happened….. when you recognise it isn’t shifting….is one of the biggest wastes of energy…but also one of the biggest payoffs with remaining in ‘misery’ rather than allowing yourself to be happy.  That too is now gone.  

I learned how easy it is to be really REALLY hard on yourself.

I learned how to trust a teacher.  I learned how to trust myself.  I learned how much people are leaping out of a comfort zone by trusting a complete stranger to give them information in the hope that it will provide healing.

I learned that you should not take other people and their journey’s for granted.  Everyone needs to be cherished.

I had to do readings with strangers to see if I could do it…and I am very pleased to say that I can. I went into that much fear when I started the first one that my mind shut down and I got nothing. I had to get the teacher to reassure me that I was open and that I was able to see things. It just took her to say ‘yeah…your open off you go”. 

I now trust.  I now do not fear what my purpose is.  I do not fear my truth.  I know how my intuition, my Reiki and Foyster’s fits now and I can’t wait for it to unfold.

This post is to encourage you to look at the fear in your life, acknowledge it, thank it for protecting you, but it is now your time to shine and release the fear back to where it came from. We are safe, we are loved, we are protected.