Why preconceived ideas are bad for you... - Amanda Foy

Why preconceived ideas are bad for you…

Ever wondered just how many preconceived ideas and notions we live by each day?  I think if you had the time in a day to actually sit and make a tally everytime your brain went into, ‘yeah I know’ when you were listening or speaking to someone, I reckon you’d run out of space on the paper.

By going into, ‘yeah I know’, I mean your brain in it’s little state of preconception is already expecting what’s coming, or what’s being viewed or what’s making you feel like crap….but I’m asking you today, ladies and gentlemen, to knock it off!!  Happiness is blissful – get it?

Seriously, I am making today – the 17th of May, 2010 the day that I knock it off and invite you to join me.

For me, I go into nano seconds of dread everytime I hear my children speak because of my experiences as an adult, my brain leaps to the ‘eeeekkkk’ factor before they’ve even finished speaking.  Like last weekend, my youngest was talking to my eldest about what he was putting on to go out….”…..have you got your Bull Shirt?  I have.”

My brain went it a nano second of dread….all it heard was “Bull Sh” and heart into throat, dropped stomach feeling….and then came the “irt”, and I was able to relax and then giggle to myself shaking my head as I walked back into my room.  What was I giggling about and shaking my head to?  My own stupid NEGATIVE reaction to something that ended up being harmless….in a nanosecond. 

Another time my eldest was in watching Foxtel and he yelled out “Mummy these two dogs are stuck together!” We’d only just got Foxtel – he was 5, I hadn’t planned on the birds and bees discussion for another 10 years (garf snort)…..stupid freakin’ Foxtel, it’s 2:30 in the afternoon, what were they thinking putting something like that on…. So as I raced into the lounge with all colour leeched from my face as I scanned the room for the remote so I could switch it off before he saw anymore, I am greeted by some strange cartoon where there is a THING that is half dog, half cat…I think…..  See what a “yeah I know” mind set can do to you….really….is it worth it?

My children are the Master Teachers in how to switch your mind from negative to positive (mummy)….my children are teachers in how to not think the worst before being pleasantly surprise with priceless.  Seriously, who do I speak to about this stupid mind set?  Why can’t my brain say in that same nanosecond “we don’t swear in front of our children, we know they don’t swear in front of us, my children have been given good grounding in social skills, my children are capable of knowing right from wrong, my children will never feel comfortable enough in my home to utter a profanity until they are well into their late 30’s when they will go into the same stupid mindset as their mother and wonder what the #$%^ is going on….”

My children are also my husband’s master teachers in how to be careful of 100% complete honesty in a young brain or memory – it will come back to haunt you in less than 5 minutes of saying things.  Our youngest has a little play mate from next door.  He’s only been there a little while, but he’s already jumping the fence to play.  The little boy needs to go to the toilet and our son invites him to come up and use ours.  “It’s ok, the flusher is really loud, but our toilet is great.”  Friend: “But, I want to do a poo, I’ll go home.” But our beautiful son, in all his natural loving mode of giving wouldn’t hear of it, he persuaded his new friend to use ours.  Husband goes into nanosecond mindset…what if they have a vomitting bug, what if he doesn’t know how to use toilet paper, what if he has an accident.” He ran a full scenario through his head that virtually had us all in hospital on drips due to the level of contamination from one small child’s backside in our toilet.  He then took our son aside and let him know his version of protocol when it comes to needing to poo when you are in our backyard and your own toilet is a mere 15 meters away if you’d just jump back over the fence.  Well, lesson learned father and husband who is swaddled in the ‘yeah I know’ mindset….our son very loudly told his new friend that next time he needed to poo he would have to go home because “Dad said you’ll make us sick.”  Dad – 0 Youngest Son – 1

Sigh….so I would like to reiterate….’knock it off’.  Seriously, how many nanoseconds add up to one second which will give you a stroke.  Don’t sweat the little stuff people!

1 Comment

  1. this parenting thing can sometime be a hard gig Foy – I love the way you write about it, in your always witty way!

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